And the heavens opened and there was much rejoicing

Yesterday, I went on an epic quest in search of the elusive orthodontic wax.

I was positive that I had seen it on a particular shelf in a drug store the last time I was there. I went to a different location of the same chain, only to find they didn't carry it.

I then drove all the way across town to the original location where I'd seen the wax, expecting that it would be exactly where it was just a few days ago, but it wasn't there, either.

I begged the store clerks to help me find it, but they confirmed the fact that it wasn't there. I soon realized that I was so desperate for the stuff that I had actually been hallucinating it was at the store. They don't carry it, and hadn't carried it for years. It was all just a beautiful, beautiful dream created by my wax-deprived mind.

It's kind of sad, really.

I was almost in tears when I realized that you can't really buy this stuff in stores, at least not in my city. Also, my orthodontist doesn't have an office in town - he just comes in on weekends every few weeks, so it's not as though I could get some from him.

And then one of the clerks suggested I go to the dentist's office in the mall to see if they had any.

Good idea! I ran there and begged the clerk at the desk for some, conveniently not mentioning that I was not at all a patient at that office.

She wasn't sure if they had any, but after much searching in a back room, she came out with a plastic baggie with about a lifetime supply of the stuff. I almost kissed her, I was so relieved.

And then I mushed a whole bunch of that stuff into my wires and cried tears of joy.

Sigh.

Life is good.

Damn you, Four Months Ago Bella!

One of my new brackets is rubbing against the inside of my upper lip, creating a very raw bump that catches on the metal every time I talk, smile, eat and...do just about everything.

Last night, I tore apart my purse, bathroom, bedroom searching for that little magical box of orthodontic wax. The fact that I couldn't find it anywhere drove me absolutely nuts, because I'm the Queen of knowing exactly where all of my stuff is at any given time. It's my thing.

As I obsessed over where it could possibly be, I suddenly got a very distinct image in my mind of me tossing the box in the garbage four months ago and saying smugly to myself, "Hah! I'm never going to need that again!"

Right now, I would be quite happy to smack Four Months Ago Bella across her braceless face.

(In case you were wondering: Yup, braces + raw lip = cranky Bella.)